I am slowly getting settled in my new space. I haven’t had a living room/kitchen of my own in over 6 years. So I have been slowly gathering furniture.
First it was a small kitchen table. (It is not fun eating dinner at my desk even when it cleared off).
Today I bought a new bed.
It is getting home-y-er and home-y-er each day.
The best way to describe the shift in home decorations is a moving from “early serial killer” to “permanent graduate student.”
May 1, 2007 by Gene
Change
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April 24, 2007 by Gene
Tag! You’re it.
An odd game of tag has broken out on the blogosphere. Someone posts a question on their blog and then “tags” 5 people who are also blog to answer the same questions. If all goes well they also tag 5 people, creating a tree of responses. For some reason this is called a “meme”.
In the past 7 days I was tagged byKaren (who was part of Brad and Joia’s travel group to China) and Michael (the first person I met during orientation my freshman year off college).
Karen nominated me for a thinking blogger in her post“Aw-Shucks!”. Basically, it is a list of 5 blogs that make you think. My 4 in no particular order (and yes I have posted about many of these before).
The Dilbert Blog: Scott Adams, the creator of Dilbert, blogs daily about what is on his mind. He is not afraid to take on touchy subjects. Half the time I think he is a total whack-job, but he is willing to change thoughts and beliefs we take for granted.
Seth Godin’s blog: Seth is a marketing person. He has written a number of book that I like enough to own and go back to. He writes a lot about the creative process.
Thoughts On the Way: Cameron Conant is a Nashville based writer. He describes himself with the Maya Angelo thought, “I am not a Christian, but I am trying to be.” Very open self-assessment of his own journey.
Beyond marketing: Joe Vitale is one of the most successful internet marketers of all time. His blog is very rarely about marketing. It is more about chasing dreams. From time to time he gets a little new-agey, but I love his willingness to chase dreams and challenge others to do the same. More than once a week something he rights causes me to change the way I am chasing my dreams.
Mike tagged me as part of Alex Shalman’s
I have no shortage of goals, but I don’t like the phrase of the question. It implies the only way I can say that I have lived the best possible life if I am able to check of certain things off a list. I do have such a list, but what is more important than doing certain things is how I think I will grow and change by trying to reach such goals. Also, the question doesn’t take into account that the world and (hopefully) I am going to change. The list can’t be static. Therefore any goal list I have today is subject to review as soon as lunch time.
Here are some goals I have and (more importantly) why:
40 countries by 40 (to count a country I must spend 7 nights in it): I love international travel because it makes me look at the world from a different point of view. It is easy to fall into the trap to assume my thoughts are the best thoughts because they are based on my experience, but that experience is so incomplete. By visiting other cultures I am forced to challenge my assumptions. By making myself stay 7 days I am more likely to wonder away from the tourist traps and see what that local culture is really like. By setting the goal of 40 by 40 it has created as sense of urgency. As I am planning each year it forces me to think creativity of where I would like to go and how I am going to get there. I am desperately behind because I keep going back to countries I like and still have much to learn from.
Appear on Fresh Air with Terry Gross: I will live a long and happy life if I never appear on any radio show, but I did this it would be I have created something very cool. Fresh Air doesn’t have your typical radio guest, whom are trying to sell something, but instead are movers and shakers in some field. They have written a book or created/starred in tv/movie that is thoughtful and meaningful. If I appeared on Fresh Air I will have created something that is meaningful to culture. I fancy myself a creative and hope to create something(s) that are thought provoking, healing and/or challenging.
Keynote NCCYM: It is an arrogant statement to say I have something to offer and to long for a particular stage. The group of people who adore more than any other are adults who take time to love and support young people. As we have crossed the country time and again I have been blessed with the opportunity meet and be touched by so many of these adults. They are underserved. Because of this it has driven me to write my first book, start an e-newsletter, and speak at retreats and training for nothing (next to nothing). If I reached this goal, it would mean that I have honed my craft to the point that others think I have something to offer on such a large prestigious stage. It would also mean I could stand in front of 2000 of these adults to tell them they are loved and even if no one back home ever says thank you, I do.
Become an EFT Master This is a training and working process that takes 5 years. If I achieve this it will mean that (1) I have improved my skill set as coach and practitioner, (2) contributed to the state of the art of helping people to heal, and (3) be witness to many many people gaining and improving health.
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April 2, 2007 by Gene
Volunteer
We had the weekend off. For a break from youth rallies and youth events I spent Saturday as a volunteer at the a local youth event.
I spent the day putting up signs, dashing to the store for supplies, handing out granola bars, and giving directions to groups as they moved from one station to the next (as well as many other tasks).
It was lots of fun (I enjoy behind the scenes as much as stage) and much more tiring than the normal work we do.
At one point one of the adults who was chaperoning a youth group asked me if I was part of APeX. She then explained that she was now 25 and a regularly work with the youth at her parish and that she remembers seeing us in High School.
Most people whom I have told this story to have responded with, “Doesn’t that make you feel old?”
That thought couldn’t have been further from my mind. My first thought was, “Wow! Someone remembered us.”
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March 24, 2007 by Gene
Heart Broken
I was standing in the lobby of the hotel we are working at this weekend watching the high school students mill into the ballroom.
Somehow one thought jumped to another to yet another (the way thoughts do) and I found myself thinking of someone I went to jr. and sr. high with.
She was a very beautiful and had an uncommon sense of style (especially for Casper, WY). She was the only person I knew who read Vogue and dressed well enough to be in it.
I don’t think I ever shared a single word with her in all the time we were in school together. She was much higher in the high school food chain than me (not that she wouldn’t talk to me, but our paths never crossed).
Two thoughts came to mind. One was of a friend saying really rude things about her (which made little sense to me for she wasn’t the typical target of teenage scorn). The second thought was of her after college. She had moved to New York, was working to Tommy Hilfiger, and one day took her own life.
Suddenly sadness washed over me. For her, that she felt so alone and believed there was no other choice. For me (and people like me), who never got a chance to know her.
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March 22, 2007 by Gene
State Spelling Chimp!
I sent an e-mail to someone who doesn’t know me well and probably doesn’t know I am dyslexic. Because of the dyslexia, I end up writing things that have real words, spelled correctly with the help of spell check, which aren’t the right word. This sometime causes some confusion (and unintentional comedy).
Here is part of the e-mail that caused confusion.
I was explaining why I hadn’t written back in a timely fashion. In the e-mail I wrote, “I am still settling in my new place and internet access is dependent on the wife I can borrow (which isn’t around in the evening).”
It was suppose to read “WiFi I can borrow”. I can’t even imagine the confusing I created.
Here are some of my favorite spelling blunders from the past:
* Once sent a contract to “The Sacred Heart of Mary”. The contract I sent read “scared heat of Mary”.
* I sent a letter to a bunch of churches in TX about a tour we were doing. It was suppose to read “you and the parish next on our trip are responsible for getting us from one location to the next.” Instead it read, “one lactation to the next”
* Describing some food I was eating in Ecuador I wanted to say “wrapped in corn” but wrote “raped in corn”
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March 18, 2007 by Gene
Love Me, Love Me, Say That You Love Me
(Sung like the Cardigans circa 1997)
Evaluations from a conference we helped out at in December, “We love the APeX guys, but could you get someone else for a change.”
Ouch!
Someone said for someone else (or so we have heard), “I don’t like APeX because they always do the same stuff.”
Ouch!
The first comment came in the middle over 100 pages of evaluations and comments about the event. It is the only one I remember.
The second comment was shared with me at the end of a day in which over 50 adults had personally thanked us for our work and our presence (many who have seen us multiple times). It was the only comment I could think about as I drifted off to sleep.
I think the reason these comments haunt me is because they reconfirm my own fears.
I love the work we do. I know we have worked very hard and are committed to quality. One some level we must be doing something right because we have found enough work to make a living for close to a decade.
But there are times, late at night (when nothing good crosses ones mind) we I think I am a fraud. That I am closer to being the man behind the curtain than the public face that is put forward.
As I hear these comments, it is easy enough to get defensive, because I justify and defend why me make the choices we make (and it is not because of laziness).
But that does me no good.
It is good to listen to critique and criticism. It is good to be challenged to be better and to grow.
It is useless to agonize and lament. It is debilitating to give all my energy to defending my actions.
It is best to listen, process and let it go.
It is that simple.
Too bad it isn’t that easy.
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March 13, 2007 by Gene
What’s left?
States left to perform in:
Alabama, Alaska, Arizona, Arkansas, California, Colorado, Connecticut, Delaware, District of Columbia, Florida, Georgia, Hawaii, Idaho, Illinois, Indiana, Iowa, Kansas, Kentucky, Louisiana, Maine, Maryland, Massachusetts, Michigan, Minnesota, Mississippi, Missouri, Montana, Nebraska, Nevada, New Hampshire, New Jersey, New Mexico, New York, North Carolina, North Dakota, Ohio, Oklahoma, Oregon, Pennsylvania, Rhode Island, South Carolina, South Dakota, Tenseness, Texas, Utah, Virginia, Vermont, Washington, West Virginia, Wisconsin, Wyoming
[and yes, I typed all the state names without the uses of a map]
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March 5, 2007 by Gene
Getting Called Out
I very publicly stated at the beginning of the year that I was going to change the way I talk. I did it publicly to create a accountability structure, people who would hold me to my word.
I have been doing a decent job at it too. I have been much better about my self-deprecating speak. Even more important, I have done a much better job about the way I talk to others. There have been a number of times I have been able to catch words in my mouth and not let them out.
Except when it comes to two people. A few weeks ago we were in San Diego. Myself and another speaker were arriving about the same time. The moment he got to baggage claim I was into it. Giving him a hard time about carrying bag because of his age and that we should take a bus to the parking lot because of his weak heart.
All in jest. To a dear friend.
And he called me on it. He said he read my blog and thought I had given this up. In a weak defense I said he was exempt.
Than last week in LA I found myself doing it again too another friend.
Maybe it is harder because both of these people like to joust with words, they fight back and it is fun.
But that is no excuse. I still stick to my original premise. It is wrong and destructive for me to do.
I love the fact I have friends who will call me out.
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March 2, 2007 by Gene
Airport First
As I was gathering my belongings off of the x-ray machine at the Orange County airport last night when a woman who works for TSA said, “Do you have a girlfriend?”
Excuse me?
“Do you a have girlfriend?”
I have come to expect the unexpected at the airport, but this was outside even my expectations.
No, she was not hitting on me. But instead thought I looked like a character in the new movie “Because I said so.” Since the movie was a “chick flick” (her words), she thought I wouldn’t go on my own.
But it might be a good move to take a girlfriend to.
Since I don’t have one, her advice, “Take your mother.”
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